Contributor Two Contributor Two
Well, Isn't That Nice...
Contributor Two Contributor Two

A teacher was finishing up a lesson on the joys of discovery and the importance of curiosity. “Where would we be today,” she asked, “if no one had ever been curious?”

One child quietly spoke up from the back of the room. “Still in the Garden of Eden?”


Two delicate flowers of Southern womanhood were having a conversation on the porch swing of a large, white-pillared mansion. The first woman said, “When my first child was born, my husband built this beautiful mansion for me.”

The second woman commented, “Well, isn’t that nice.”

The first woman continued, “When my second child was born, my husband bought me that fine Cadillac automobile you see parked in the drive.”

Again, the second woman said, “Well, isn’t that nice.”

The first woman boasted again, “Then, when my third child was born, my husband bought me this exquisite diamond bracelet.”

Yet again, the second woman commented, “Well, isn’t that nice.”

The first woman then asked her, “What did your husband buy for you when you had your first child?”

The second woman replied, “My husband sent me to charm school.”

“Charm school!” the first woman cried, “Land sakes, child, what on earth for?”

The second woman just smiled and said, “Well, instead of saying ‘Who cares, you pretentious old windbag?’ I learned to say ‘Well, isn’t that nice.’”


A young boy came to Sunday school late. His teacher knew that he was usually on time and asked him if anything was wrong.

The boy said, “No, I was going to go fishing, but my dad told me that I needed to go to church.”

The teacher smiled, and asked if his dad explained to him why it was more important to go to church than to go fishing.

The little boy replied, “Yes, he did. Dad said he didn’t have enough bait for the both of us!”


While working as an airline customerservice agent, I got a call from a woman who wanted to know if she could take her dog on board the plane. I told her the dog was welcome, as long as she paid a 50-dollar charge and provided her own kennel. I further explained that the kennel needed to be large enough for the dog to stand up, sit down, turn around and roll over.

The lady just grumbled and snorted, “I’ll never be able to teach him all that by tomorrow!”


A group of expectant fathers sat nervously in the hall. A nurse beckoned to one of them and said, “Congratulations! You have a son!” Another man dropped his magazine, jumped up and yelled, “Hey, what’s the idea? I got here two hours before he did!”


Joyce from Versailles, Kentucky, sends in this hair-raising funny…

My husband’s supervisor at work recently made a comment about the length of my husband’s hair. It had gotten a little long and shaggy, so his boss began to elaborate about the virtues of a good haircut.

“A decent haircut makes an elderly man look younger and a younger man seem more mature,” he said.

My husband asked, “How would a haircut make a middle-aged man like me appear?”

“Still employed,” was his answer.


Now that's funny!